Inspiration, My Jesus Year Challenge

Days 159-213: Changes & Challenge “Fails”

adventure begins

Wow. I haven’t written in a LONG time, and yes, I know had bad that looks for my Jesus Year Challenge. A lot has been happening over the past couple months that I couldn’t be super public about (not that there are tons of people looking at my lil’ ole blog). But, now that it’s out in the open at work, I can say on the internets for all to read, I’M MOVING TO NASHVILLE! Big changes ahead as I prepare for the next chapter. Continue reading…

Inspiration, My Jesus Year Challenge

Day 19 – F Fear

Lately I’ve felt like my brain is full of all of the difficult choices I’m not making. Opportunities seem to creep up on me, but they aren’t what I’m seeking and the work I’m putting in to create the opportunities I want seems like it’s in vain. I think it was Rumi that said, “What you seek is seeking you,” but sometimes it really doesn’t feel that way. I’m out there with a bullseye, but what I’m looking for can’t seem to find me, no matter how hard I chase it down. (And no, I’m not talking about a relationship.)

In the end it feels like the things I have to choose from aren’t the things I want. But I know I can throw caution to the wind; I can make the choice to pick up and go at any time – make the move I want to make and trust that I will be financially okay. That is a choice I can make, and it’s terrifying. I sure could use a sign.


Better Late Than Never

I started this draft back in August 2014 around my birthday but never sent it to publish. I just reread it and think the sentiments still ring true, especially with a new year ahead. Be good to yourselves this year, and be good to the people around you too.

As my birthday rapidly approaches, I’ve been thinking a lot about the things I wish I knew when I was younger. The past couple of years has been a period of growth bigger than any other point in my life, and while I don’t live with regret, there are some things I wish I had learned/accepted sooner. 

Life is short and precious and messy and perfect and no part of it should be spent living in fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of heartbreak. Fear of failure. Fear of the unknown. All of these fears are pointless and will not help anyone lead a fulfilled and happy life. We all get rejected, have our hearts broken, take risks, and fail sometimes. That’s part of being alive and being human. Despite knowing this on a fundamental level, my own actions and behaviors were driven by fear for a long time. It’s something I’m still working on.

Love yourself for who and what you are, and always strive to be the best version of yourself possible. When I say love yourself, I mean all of your unique imperfections. Your so-called flaws. Insecurity, especially for a woman about her body, will eat away at her slowly over time. It took a very long time for me to love the body that I have. Even though there are things I’d like to improve for the long-term health benefits (bad back anyone), I no longer live my life constantly thinking that I’m fat and would be “so much prettier if I lost 10 pounds.” My curves are beautiful and womanly and something that should be celebrated, not cut-down when I look in the mirror. 

Let go of toxic relationships – the bad friends/frenemies, the shitty significant others, the family members that you don’t owe anything to simply because they’re family. This is one I definitely still struggle with. I find myself always giving people the benefit of the doubt and have a hard time letting go of relationships that don’t make me happy. The people in your life should help make you the best version of yourself and you should do the same for them. If they aren’t, let them go. You don’t owe it to anyone else to be miserable.

Celebrate every part of your life. You only get to live it once.